Exhausted and Elated- Skyler is 2 weeks and 3 days old

Extremely exhausted. Have been pooped on twice now and Skyler projectile vomited on me this morning. She also latched on and drank for a very long time- yaay

I am so tired but still so happy and elated at this little gift. Can’t believe God gave this gift to me to raise. I love her so much and just want to drink in every single moment. I would not change this for anything in the world

My mom just left after visiting for a week. It is so amazing to see how much happiness and joy Skyler brings her. She was such a big help while here I actually wish we could stay in the same complex or something. Sure sometimes my mom drives me insane but no one will ever love me more and the way she is in love with my little gift is amazing.

My sister has been here a lot- keeps brining clothes and headbands and cute stuff for Skyler

Once again I am exhausted but honestly this is so amazing.

I have started working- three days ago. It’s hard but is manageable and it makes me feel like I can still earn a living so I’m happy.

I found a school for Skyler – so happy about that. One where I feel she will be safe and looked after and nurtured. I can’t imagine dropping her and having to leave her but she will always be well looked after – me and her daddy will make sure of it

Her dad is so wonderful with her- wants to do everything for her and keeps looking at her with such awe and amazement. I still can’t believe we made her. I still can’t believe she is as cute as she is. This truly is the best thing that has ever happened to me. There can be nothing better than this…IMG_2303 IMG_2316

Second Trimester of Pregnancy – Truly this is the honeymoon period

No it does not start at exactly 12 or 13 weeks. My morning sickness lasted until 18 weeks and then from week 19 I started feeling a bit more human again, a tad bit happier and a bit less pessimistic and bithcy.

From week 20 I felt wonderful. I marveled at how easy it was to be pregnant. I still had a lot of acne on my freakin chin but at least I was not puking 24.7. I was not extremely exhausted every second of every day, my boobs did not feel like they were being tortured and I had forgotten what it feels like to have a constant headache with the urge to pee.

So here is the thing: the second trimester bliss lasted for about six weeks for me. But trust me, the six week break is extremely welcome if you had a first trimester from hell.

Then as your belly starts to really expand and finally you start showing (cause you just could not wait to start showing and kept praying to look pregnant instead of just fat) you start to get uncomfortable. And while it is still durable during the day sleep leaves you for probably forever.

I have not slept through the night since I was 24 weeks pregnant. I get up to pee all the time or to change position.

So yes, showing is wonderful, but while you are waiting for your belly to show, be thankful for the sleep., the deep, untroubling, pillow soaking-drooling sleep (Oh yes that’s another thing you might not know about pregnancy – you drool a lot! Apparently you have more saliva in your mouth – since I knew I was pregnant I would wake up every night with half of my face plastered to my pillow praying my husband did not witness the horrific sight).

Another weird thing about the second trimester: even though I am not a smoker I kept craving menthol cigarettes (which yes I have smoked socially before). Obviously this was a craving I could not give into but it made me wonder… craving cigarettes while pregnant??? I could have ice cream, fudge, cake (oh and believe me I did – in moderation of course 😉 ) but instead I crave cigarettes because I know I absolutely cannot have them…

Baby Foot

Baby foot on ultrasound